Emotional Cheating Signs – Could These Be Signs Of An Affair?
Emotional cheating signs are often subtle and can be hard to detect, but changes in a spouse’s behavior can often signify cheating in relationships if you know what to look for. What a person feels on the inside can be extremely hard to hide on the outside, so if you pay attention to what your spouse says and does, you’ll often pick up on signs of emotional infidelity quite easily.
Once you’ve picked up on signs of an emotional affair, you’ll need to trust your gut instincts. This can be one of the hardest parts of dealing with infidelity in marriage.
Even when you know in your heart your spouse is cheating on you, it can be extremely difficult to trust your extincts because you’ll often find yourself making excuses for them. You’ll find yourself convincing yourself it’s not true or accepting their lies and deceit because you don’t want to face the reality that you really have been betrayed.
If your heart is telling you they are cheating and you need proof, software like Spouse Spy can give you the answers you’re looking for. Sometimes doing your own investigative work is the only way to get the truth.
If you’ve been with your spouse or partner in a relationship for any length of time, then you should know their behaviors quite well and can probably pick up on how they are feeling. For example, you can tell when they’re happy, sad, stressed, worried, etc. You know by the way they talk and by the way they act.
Any changes in their behavior, be it good or bad, can signify signs of emotional cheating. Of course there can be other reasons for changes in behavior that aren’t related to cheating.
For example, your spouse might be stressed at work. Perhaps they spent money on something and are worried you’ll be incredibly upset if you find out about it. Maybe they’ve been burdened with bad news from another family member.
The reasons for changes in behavior are endless, but what I’m saying is simply this: if your spouse is having an emotional affair at work or with a friend, it will be difficult for them to hide it completely because, as humans, how we feel on the inside is closely mirrored by how we act on the outside.
In a study looking at infidelity statistics in the United States, the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapy revealed 15 percent of wives and 25 percent of husbands engage in sexual relationships outside of marriage. That’s quite alarming by itself, but when emotional affairs are thrown into the equation, the numbers jump by more than 20 percent. In this day and age, it seems no relationship is safe from an affair.
Emotional affairs at work tend to make up a large percentage of these numbers, and some research shows over 50 percent of opposite sex, work friendships end up turning into something more. Emotional affairs are also on the rise due to an increase in online affairs and internet infidelity and because technologies like texting have made it easier to flirt and develop intimate connections with people outside of marriage.
Most people who get involved with emotional cheating don’t purposely go out looking to get tangled up in an affair. However, as the relationship grows with a friend or co-worker, thoughts and feelings get shared, and suddenly two people are sharing their most intimate emotions with each other. The relationship turns to secrecy and deceit and the risk of emotional affairs turning intimate skyrockets.
So how do you go about discovering signs of infidelity?
Emotional Cheating Signs – Could These Signal Trouble In Your Relationship?
Below are some emotional affair signs that can signal trouble in your relationship, regardless of whether it’s you or your partner who is committing them. Identifying one or two of them in you or your spouse may not mean anything. However, if a growing number of them seem to apply to your relationship, then it’s time to take a step back and have a second look at your relationship.
- Sharing personal and intimate thoughts and feelings with someone who is not your spouse or partner
- Spending more time with your friend than you do with your spouse or partner and actively seeking more time with them
- Not telling your spouse or partner about the time you spend with your friend, co-worker, etc.
- Finding yourself having feelings of attraction toward your friend
- Working late more often than normal and seeming to spend great amounts of time away from home
- A decline in emotional intimacy
- A decline in physical intimacy
- Constantly thinking of your friend even when you’re spending time with your spouse
- Caring more about your appearance than normal
- Secretly calling or texting your friend and not telling your spouse about it
- Lying about where you were or about how much time you spend with your friend
- Feeling a closer connection and bond to your friend than you do to your spouse
- Discussing intimate details of your marriage with your friend or co-worker and confiding in them about your relationship with your spouse
- Feeling jealous when your friend is spending time with someone else
- Feeling guilty or uncomfortable if you’re around your friend and spouse at the same time
- Feeling nervous or having the feeling that you “might get caught” if your spouse saw you spending time with your friend or listened in on your conversations
- Feeling like you’re not doing anything wrong, but still having a sense of guilt about it
- Sexual withdrawal
- Being guarded and defensive in conversation
- Hiding or deleting voicemails and text messages so your spouse won’t see them
- Bringing up your concerns to your spouse and having them just laugh it off and say, “Oh, don’t worry. We’re just friends.”
Some of the above signs of emotional cheating are signs you won’t be able to detect in your spouse. For example, you probably won’t know how often they think about their friend or if they’re having feelings of attraction toward their friend unless you’re lucky enough to see them interacting and notice your spouse flirting or being overly friendly.
However, you can still look for things like physical or emotional withdrawal, being guarded and defensive in conversation, spending more time away from home, having stories that seem to have loose ends or that seem to keep changing, and noticing your spouse being more secretive.
If you’ve already found yourself in the middle of an affair, then working on emotional affair recovery and learning how to survive an affair can be your most important next step.
When it’s all said and done, looking for change in your spouse or partner will be your best bet for identifying emotional cheating signs.
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